Many people will walk in and out of your life but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart...
~~Eleanor Roosevelt
Friendship. Isn't that one of the most beautiful words there is? It wasn't until this past year that I truly realized how meaningful and precious true friends really are. Why is it that we often have to have the things we treasure most taken away before we can completely appreciate them? A year ago I never would have imagined a world where going to church in person was not always an option...Where college classes took place from a desk in my bedroom instead of an actual classroom...Where bible studies and times of fellowship were either cut down in capacity or cancelled for the foreseeable future...
Over this past year I learned a lot about friendship, both in my own life and even in my nursing studies. Did you know that the friendships you make have a major impact on your physical and emotional well-being? It shouldn't be a surprise to us, but studies have shown that people with good support networks and friendships have a much lower risk of health problems such as high blood pressure, strokes, or heart disease. When you are close friends with someone, you share everything, even 1% of your DNA!! Before a child can start walking or talking they are able to understand the emotions that come with friendship and fellowship. How incredible is that?!
When I arrived on campus this past spring I remember feeling so constrained by the tight requirements that had been put into place. Social gatherings on campus were limited to groups of five people or less, communal areas were disassembled, study groups and tutoring were moved online, and classes remained virtual or hybrid. It felt somewhat like I was living in a dream as I walked along the familiar campus pathways. Instead of friendly smiles and groups of friends, I passed solitary individuals, unable to be seen under constrictive cloth masks.
Humans are made for fellowship. This past year I have realized this more and more. I have felt so distanced from my friends and struggled with feeling very lonely. I didn't understand why I was fighting this fear, anger, and doubt. My family was healthy! I was still able to pursue my nursing degree. Shouldn't that be enough? There were people around me who were genuinely walking through intense trials, facing sickness, pain, and even death. Why was I not content? What was wrong with me?
Whenever I felt anxiety begin to creep into my life, I stepped back and tried to pinpoint where this negativity was coming from. I realized that I was always at my happiest whenever I was around other people. Gathering with a group of friends, even just for a short evening of games, food, and laughter raised my spirits so much. A Sunday night gathering could transform my entire week. The feeling of being able to throw off my mask for a few hours and just enjoy a sense of fellowship became so precious! I realized that my sadness was springing from a strong sense of isolation. Whenever we are forced to be on our own, it is far too easy for our thoughts to selfishly turn inward. I started thinking about myself, my feelings, emotions, wants, and needs. This just wasn't healthy!! As humans made in God's image, our thoughts should be focused on those around us and how we can be a light in an very dark world full of so much sin and pain.
The idea of friendship is not only physically and emotionally beneficial: it is also spiritual. Some of my favorite Bible verses are about the importance and power of friendship...
Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.
So then, as we have opportunity, let us do good to everyone, and especially to those who are of the household of faith...Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ
And all who believed were together and had all things in common.
For where two or three are gathered in my name, there am I among them.
Not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.
Of course, it is not always possible to meet together with people. If anything, this year has taught me to treasure time with my dearest friends more than ever!! However, I have also come to be far more grateful for Facetime calls, letters, emails, and texts to keep connections when we are forced to be apart. When we cannot be together in person, our fellowship becomes far more valued and we can find creative ways to let others know we care. That might be hours on the phone, or it may be a simple text to let a loved one know you are thinking of them. Regardless of which you have time for, it is so important to show that you care and to recognize the importance of maintaining relationships.
There is nothing like finding a true friend. Best friends know everything about you and love you anyway! You can feel free to be yourself around them without feeling judged. You can count on them to love you enough to tell you when you make mistakes and help you set your priorities straight again. You can laugh, cry, and "do life" with them, picking each other up when you fall and helping keep each other on the right path. You can pray for, encourage, and love each other as you seek to live out life faithfully together.
No matter how different your friendships have looked like this past year, I would encourage you to hold your loved ones close today. Let them know they are on your heart, no matter what form of communication that takes! I promise you will never regret the moments you spend telling someone you care about them. It will cause you to turn your thoughts outward, treasure your past memories and form new ones that you will be able to hold onto forever. Thank God for your friendships today; they are truly a rich blessing!
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