Corona. It's blowing up everyone's Facebook feeds, shutting down schools, and forcing thousands to telecommute or work from home. It seems hard to imagine that a single virus can cause so much chaos! For those of us in UAH's nursing program, corona also means no more clinicals this semester.
We all have been preparing ourselves for the fact that clinicals would soon be over, but it doesn't mean that my heart didn't sink when the email finally came. I opened my inbox to read that rotations have been cancelled for the rest of this school year. My clinical experiences have been incredible so far, and I have learned so much. I have been thankful for each and every moment I have gotten to spend with my instructor, clinical group, nurses, care teams, and patients. Knowing that I was taking my scrubs off for the last time made me so sad. I completely understand the need to prevent the spread of the virus, and I firmly believe it is the right decision. Still, many of us are left with lots of questions. How we are going to get the hours we need to graduate? How we will take our HESI's? How are we going to do test reviews? How are we going to cover all the material we need to before the semester is over? The transition to online software, assignments, and meetings with professors have left my head spinning. I don't think my inbox has ever been so full, and I cannot even imagine the stress our professors are going through right now as they navigate these huge challenges.
I have been battling a cold these past couple weeks, and it has left me feeling drained physically and emotionally. My anxiety levels have been sky high, and I have felt like I am living each day in uncertain anticipation. I know that may sound silly, because I have so much less to worry about than others right now. My family is recovering from runny noses and sore throats, but we don't have Corona! We have a warm home, plenty of food, all of our books and supplies, and most importantly the faith that God is sovereign over all of this and will work absolutely everything out in His perfect timing. I am trying to remind myself of these truths and turn away from my worries into the certainty of God's control. God isn't surprised by any of this! My unknowns are all "knowns" to Him. Each and every day I am clinging to the prayer above by Lysa Terkheurst: "Lord, help me to trade my unbelief for the beautiful relief that I don't have to figure everything out." As soon as I stop trying to take control, I feel an overwhelming sense of calm. I don't need to figure this out!
I think we can all agree that the world seems very disordered right now! Grocery stores are empty of all toiletries, medicines, frozen foods, and canned goods. Employees are going into work only to be sent home and quarantined. Schools are closed, people are scared, and new cases of the virus continue to appear. Still, Colossians 3:5 tells us to "let the peace of God reign in your hearts." God is not a God of chaos-but of peace. Jesus says, "I have told you all this so that you may find your peace in ME. You will find trouble in this world-but, never lose heart. I have overcome the world!" (John 16:33)
It's times like these I need to remind myself of all the things I am thankful for...the funny cows on my beautiful run, the extra time to bake yummy treats with my little sister for her science fair project, the sweet smiles of my younger siblings, cozy family movie nights, steaming bowls of soup and mugs of Piper and Leaf tea on cold dreary days, the familiar comfort of homeschooling once again, and the precious smiles of the cutest little study buddy I could ask for!
As the days of this quarantine drag on, I'm praying that God will keep you all healthy physically, emotionally, and spiritually! It can be hard to be physically apart from people when it feels like we need them more than ever. Emotionally this time has been so draining. Many tears have been shed as flights have been cancelled, visits postponed, and plans rearranged. My heart is hurting for all the seniors who are uncertain about when they are going to graduate or who have been torn away from their last few months of college life. Spiritually it is hard to grapple with the conflict between the confusion we see and the truths we hold in our hearts. Please let me know how I can be praying for you specifically. We will all get through this together!
Comments